Jessie

jcope @ 2002-02-08T20:10:00

2002-02-09T01:09:38Z

jcope

jcope @ 2002-02-08T20:09:00

2002-02-09T01:09:06Z

test

2002-02-09T01:08:26Z

[font size=8][font color=jcope]

I'm de-WHAT?!

2001-10-19T02:21:47Z

Went to the doctor today, not a regular "I'm coughing" or "I'm barfing so give me some drugs" visit. It was mostly just talking. I am a mental case. **sigh** Not really, I'm exaggerating. But it turns out the things that cause me such angst are not physical at all. Oh well, finding the problem is one step closer to fixing it I suppose.

On another note (and no, this is not a BAD thing), I'm moving out of the ole apartment. That's right, by December 1st, I'll be back in Mommy's nest (finally!) for a while. It's just not what I want right now. I'm not rich, and I don't have a wonderful high paying job, and I've decided that going back to school is much more important than the fictitious "freedom" I get from living on my own. I wish I'd sucked it up senior year and earned my scholarships (and accepted them) so I could be living on campus right now. But...we take our blows and try to keep our heads up high, and this is what I'm doing. I'm not ashamed, I'm doing just fine on my own. This is totally my decision. There's plenty of time for paying bills and stuff. If I don't follow my heart now, I have a feeling I might not get another chance.

So, here's to being young and being able to correct our mistakes while we still have time. Sorry this is so heavy lol, I'm not trying to seem all theoretical. Ah well, hope you all are feeling as much clarity as me tonite. Love ya, miss some of you a whole lot.

Here's one for the sunny days

2001-08-15T02:25:13Z

Have you ever realized that there's always SOMETHING wrong with the weather?? It's never just perfect, it's either too hot, cold, sunny, humid, rainy, cloudy etc. Being an Ohio resident, you realize that the only thing that ever makes you think about the weather is how crappy it is. Well here's to today. Today was perfecto if you ask me! I never actually say "what a perfect day," because when it is perfect, I don't think about it. Today was awesome. Just thought I'd tell everyone. ;o)

Nighters

Big fat puffy eyes

2001-08-14T16:13:41Z

Well, here I sit again. Brett's at work, not having a good day, and I am home sick. :0P I hate being sick. I want to sleep all day cause I feel like crap, and then at night I just want to get outta here cause I've been sitting/laying around here all day long! It's making me crazy! I am soooo going to work tomorrow, I don't care if I feel like crap or not. I think it's that place that makes me sick anyway. They keep it like 60 degrees in there, and it's like 90 outside....you do the math. Not healthy. And I'm not exaggerating when I say it's like a freezer in there. REAL cold.

By the way, Rikki....I work right by where you live! I work on Nilles, I know you know where that is. In that little shopping mall by Kroger's and Taco Bell.

Anyhoo, guess me and my swollen eyes will go back to watching tv now since no one is around. Can't wait til my baby gets home from work, at least that will make me feel a little better. :o) Had a rough night last night, and my tear ducts are sooo swollen. Owie. Comes with the territory of bein a girl though.

Later all

This one is for.......

2001-08-12T18:51:57Z

Mandi B.

Sorry guys, I know I've been scearce. But it's hard to update something like this when I really never interact with anyone involved in LJ. I guess that's what happens when you grow up (and away). You make new friends, you do different things, and some of the old things just fall behind you. I don't mean to leave those things to lie, but it's just hard. I've contemplated that a lot lately. How fast I grew up, I mean. It's really odd.....I miss being younger, and all I wanted to do was grow up, have responsibility. Now I know why they say it isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Well anyway, I will try to keep up more with this thang.... by the way, all you Trenton folks, go see Tommy Puckett working at Gas America and tell him I sent you!!!!! Well, a little sunshine to everyone on this lovely Sunday. I think I'm going swimming....anybody wanna come??

Ok, guys....

2001-07-25T21:57:16Z

Nope, not dead yet. :o)

Anyway, no time to update as usual.....but.. Just so you all know, due to a massive attack by killer junk emails, I've changed my email addy. It's now:
theducky7707@yahoo.com
Not too different from the last one. And so you know....I DO write emails back... I just don't update LJ much. Miss you all...... I'll write sometime.
*J*

Hrmmm....

2001-06-25T11:30:18Z

I'm off today and going on no sleep (from work last night). Hitting the hay about 8pm tonight to prepare for my first day of work tomorrow. Felt weird walking out of Ass....*ahem* GAS America this morning knowing that I'll never have to stay up all night and clean it again hehe.

So what should I do today.........hmmm... Shopping? Nails done? Hair highlighted? Go see B at work? All of the above??? Or should I suck it up and go take care of my title transfer blah blah today? Oh and I might have to squeeze in a little bit of running Rob around town. Which is cool. This is all providing that my sometimes-ass of a little brother lets me use his car today. *crosses fingers* I sure am in the mood to shop *grin*

Hope everyone has a killer day.......I know I will. :o)

No, I haven't left the face of the earth yet

2001-06-23T12:09:31Z

Sorry I've been absent for so long kiddies....MY how I've missed keeping up to date on everyone! I've already paged back 5 times and am still reading stuff I haven't read. It's just work....and transitions....and well, I just am too lazy to get an ISP that I actually LIKE to use.... you know. :o)

So, updating....
I got a new job (HOOORAAAAY!) and I start that on Tuesday. It's in the new government building on the west side of Hamilton, on the 5th floor to be exact. That's right, I'm a government employee. I'm in the title division, so if you get a new car or something, stop in and see me! It's a great job....awesome pay and killer benefits, not to mention great hours. I got sooo lucky getting that job. I have recently come into some semi good luck. Not the too good to be true kind, but the "everything looks like it's starting to fall into place a little bit" kind. Got a "good for now" car, which I hate, but I'm not complaining, it's a car. I no longer have that "I'm too good for this" attitude, had a long talk with my mom and realized...who the heck am I anyway? I'm happy, that's all that matters. Got the new job. Came into some extra money. Boy sitch is something I don't want to go into, b/c I don't feel like rationalizing my feelings right now. I don't know what I want, and I don't want to analyze. I'll figger it out. :o)

Missing lots of friends lately. Missing hanging out, going out, old times. Get in touch guys! I'm a happy girl, it's summer, I have tons of things going my way, I have a POOL!!! Ok, well I'm off to learn how to drive my "new" car....it's a stick. Argh, this should be fun.

I'll try to update sometime before next month lol........bye guys :o)

I just don't get it..........

2001-06-07T11:50:36Z

No offense intended to anyone here....but..........

To put this in the most common terms, "pot" is going to be my downfall, one way or another. That's right. Weed, green, whatever the frick you want to call it, it usually ends up smacking me in the ass.

Wanna know the funny thing about that?
I don't even smoke it.
Isn't it ironic.........

P.S. if this made no sense to you, just nevermind, I promise I'm not a crackhead

Hrm....

2001-06-07T11:33:06Z

I miss Paul. Where the frick has he been lately? Of course...where the frick have I been lately? hehe lol. I haven't talked to him in over a week, that's a first in a long time. I'm starting to wonder...

In local news, at exactly 4:50 this morning, while I was at work, I was officially asked to be someone's girlfriend. Rob, you know who I'm talking about. Please, no smart butt comments, really. I know it's hard, but there are some things you don't know, and I do kinda like this one. Be nice. :o) But of course, me being the level-headed gal that I am (I know, don't laugh too hard), I said I'll sleep on it, perhaps for more than one day. Mostly because I just don't know. So have I given it any consideration? Not really, cause to be honest I just don't want to think about it. My last relationship was Kevin, and that was a while ago.

Ah well, nothing much new. I still have no car, I still work in the same place, and I still live in my apartment (for now). Things could change, all three of them. I was hoping just two, but maybe all three is for the best.

I'm outtie, gotta sleep.

all is not right in "Jessie Land"

2001-05-27T11:12:56Z

I think I'm depressed. I have tons of stuff on my mind, and no one to spill them to. No one objective that is. I mean, I could tell people, but they would just get offended at one thing and lecture me on another, you know? I never was one to have that really close bestest friend in the world though. I mean, I did in junior high, Rachel of course. But all through high school and into now, I have been the kind to develop lots of simple friendships, some stronger than others, but nothing like what some have. Not that I'm jealous of those types of friendships, I like my lifestyle. But sometimes I just wish I had someone to spill to. You know, there are several I would even consider doing so with, but there's just that initial awkwardness of not wanting to come of as a freak of nature.

So anyway, not much else to say. I'm stressin, but I'm holding it in pretty well. Boy, when the day arrives that all this s*** has to be aired out, it's gonna be ugly. I'm sick of worrying about things.

You know what I hate? Money. I mean I love to have it, but I hate to love to have it, you know? Cause when you don't have it, you don't have it. Am I making sense here?
I'm in a bit of a predicament. Not financially, I'm doing ok there, actually. Not grand, just ok. I think I'm going to go to sleep now. That's all I do anymore. Sleep, eat (sometimes), and go to work. And sit around. I need to get out. Go do something. But not now. G'night......

grrr

2001-05-21T09:59:09Z

I SUCK

that is all....

Well...I'm not doing very well at regular updates am I??

2001-05-18T13:14:52Z

I should have made my mood for this "drunk" lol. Jk, I'm not THAT bad. Saw Lauren Luibel the other night (Cara, I KNOW you remember her.......), and she had NO idea who I was. Could it have been the Bacardi? Or that I've changed a lot? Or hell, maybe she never liked me anyway. I dunno, it's cool. I've been so busy lately. My head is about to start spinning. Ryan was giving me a massage the other night, and he noted how knotty my muscles are.... Why AM I so stressed?? Who knows. It sounds simple from the outside. I work at a gas station, no more than 40 some hours a week, I drive my dad's F-150, I live by myself so I do what I want. So what is there to worry about? I guess I'm just a thinker. I worry about things all the time. Mostly money. I wish I could be rich sometimes. But then I know I wouldn't appreciate the things I have as much as I do now. I just want a fricking decent car of my OWN that runs. lol.

Oh yeah, guess where I'm seeking a job starting Monday??? (that is, if I've still heard nothing about asst manager at GasAmerica by then...) AK Steel. Yup, that's right. I hate to say it, but I'll have an easier time of it because I'm a woman, and you know the whole equal rights thing. Which, I think, is bullshit anyway, but I guess it is to my benefit. Plus, like 5 of my family members have retired from or still work there. And I'm kinda smart, not to be braggy. Sam better get her shit together really soon....I love Gas America, I love my customers, my fellow employees, everything, but it's not enough to make a living unless I get this promo.

Maybe I'll just call Ryan and Rob and have them make me a porn site. HAHAHAH YEAH RIGHT!!! Ugh I miss Paul. I do fine until I actually talk to him, and then I miss him even more the next day, or even right when I hang up the phone. Argh, maybe I like him too much. lol... Who knows. I think I need bed. Gotta go to church tonight. Sorry guys, hope this entry isn't as long as it feels I have been typing for!!!!

I'll try to write a little bit a little more often. buh bye :-)

Rob, any plans for tonight, or are you staying in the 'hood? Lemme know, be home after 10

Oh oh oh, get this....

2001-05-15T12:23:55Z
I almost forgot!

Apparently the word "sniffles" hasn't made it into the Virginia folks' vocab yet! Can you believe it?! I was talking to Paul, said I had the sniffles......and he said, and I quote...."Well, that's a new one." WHAT?! That's silly to me. Everyone gets the sniffles. What else would you say? My nose is snotty?? lol....

Oh and Rob, if you're reading, he didn't call me the other night (you know who) that he called you, but there was a message from him when I got home from work this morning........argh. *smacks forehead*

Well, that weekend was interesting......

2001-05-15T12:12:22Z
I had the wildest weekend ever. Ok, so it wasn't "wild," as in partying til I puked all weekend, it was wild as in strange. First of all, I worked Friday night, and wasn't happy about it. It sucks watching all these people come in while they are out doing what they want and I am stuck behind that friggin' counter. Ah well, so anyway, I stayed up Saturday and...well...what DID I do? I went to visit Brett at work and was there for about an hour just chillin and eating free Subway, then I went and hung with Grandma for a while. Then I cleaned my apartment up, and just hung out a bit. I went to pick up my bros to take them shopping, after I talked to Kevin (yup, that Kevin), and invited him over that night. I just figured he wouldn't call or come over anyway, so what's the big deal? So we shopped, I got home, took a shower, and the phone rings. Guess who? Kevin. So he says he's coming over. And he did. For a few hours. It was actually not that bad. I mean, it was kinda weird I guess, but it was really like nothing. We laughed, goofed off. Same ole thing. So then he left (high school curfews......mua hahaha) and I went to Rob's lil shindig. There were a bunch of people there. I stayed for a while, and then I came home to go to bed. Then next thing I know Rob's friend from Middletown is knocking on my door. So he stayed til like 6:45, then I finally got some sleep.

I know, so exciting you can hardly stand it right? lol...riiiight. Ohhh ohh! I almost forgot! I talked to Paul *grin* finally on Sunday night. Jeff Thomas and Evan Grimes came over for a little while just to say "whassup." We sat around and talked for a few. Then when they left I saw that Paul had been im-ing me and I wasn't at my computer. He told me to call, so I did. And we talked for a while. I missed him soooooo much :o) I was the happiest girl in the world!! Ok, ok, enough mushies.

I'm outta here, to do what, I don't know. I'm sure I'll find something!

I need suggestions for a Mother's Day gift!

2001-05-12T11:34:41Z
I'm happy that Paul's happy that he's home from school. Well, at least I think he is. That's the trouble...I miss Paul being at school b/c I never get to talk to him anymore, I mean not even online. :o( I'm one sad girl. I miss my cowboy that's for sure.

By the way, Kirsten, way cool pics of the concert! I think I saw Aria better than I could see you or Mike, then again, this moniter is kinda small (teehee). Sorry to see you're leaving LJ land, who will I call on for customer support??? teeehee...jk. But really, I totally understand your reasoning, I wish I could throw my whole computer out the window sometimes. I'd get soooo much more done. But, then the rational thoughts come back again, and tell me to just grow some balls....er, self-discipline.

Well, I'm off to tan and do some mother's day shopping....any suggestions for a good gift? My mom doesn't wear jewelry much, she's kinda picky about her clothes, and I think we've about worn her out with teddy bears and perfume lol.. I'm running low on ideas. Later y'all

Been missin' that Korn cd!!

2001-05-10T11:51:14Z
Went and bought some cds that I had stolen out of my car a few months ago. I figure if I was gonna get em back, I would have gotten them by now, so I might as well just go ahead and buy the ones I really miss. I missed this one :o) I forgot to get NSync though :o( It's ok laugh all you want. I like to sing, and they are good for my voice range. I like it :o) Annyhoo...

I'm tired. Boohoo. Same ole whiny crap. "Forgot" to go to the Y again today. Whoops haha. I went and saw my puppies this morning, they had surgery yesterday. Hehe they got spayed...finally. I guess Dad was going to breed them but changed his mind. Poor gals, he waited til they were 2 years old! They're all helpless looking, walking real slow lol. And they have naked bellies where the vet shaved 'em. Hehe they are toooo cute. Those are the jumpin'est dogs in the world, and now they can't even get up the concrete steps outside. It's so cute, but pitiful in a way.

Well I'm off to do some errands, like the tanning bed teehee. I want a shower. I'll catch y'all laters....

*"I tell my lies and I despise every second I'm with you, so I run away and you still stay so what the f*** is with you??"*

Oh my dear, sweet Jesus.....

2001-05-09T15:21:13Z
I do believe I've just spent around $840 in one day. No wait, count the gas station stop, and that makes it darn near $900......and it's not even NOON yet!!!! Oh my lord. I really am a girl!!! The sad thing....I didn't even buy any clothes. Nope, not one piece. How did I DO that?! Hehe...I'm silly. The good part about it is, I had already planned on spending about $600, and I knew I had to go to the grocery today, and I knew I was going to go to Meijer's and look at "home furnishings" again....and I knew I was going to go buy a couple cds that were on my list. Dear heavens, I was ready to spend that money! I had it spent before I got it!! lol... Ah well, it's not really a surprise. Ok, I'll stop.

Anyway, Paul is going home today, and I haven't heard anything about this weekend, so I guess it's not going to work out, which is cool. Just makes me more excited to meet him when I finally will. :o) Miss u. Hope y'all have a safe trip home from school. Hope I get to talk to you later, but the way I shopped today, I'm pretty beat. We'll see :o) If not, you know I'll be at work tonight ;o) Later all....

Today's gonna be a real winner...

2001-05-08T14:01:06Z
My throat/chest hurt a LOT. I think I have the beginnings of bronchitis again. Ewwww please no.... I hate being sick to the point where I have to be on antibiotics. I can barely remember to take pills as it is.

Went to the Y this morning after work, relieved a great deal of tension on the treadmill (4 miles!) and lifting weights. It sucks at 6 in the morning, cause it's all old people that stare at you because you're under age 60 and you're awake. hehe...Went for a nice relaxing swim after that, then showered and hit the tanning bed on the way home. Now I'm sitting here, feeling sick, and getting ready to eat and go to bed. Working out after work...that's a great way to get myself into bed before noon. I'm beat. Outtie y'all..

Ok, I want to try this one more time...it might not work...

2001-05-07T12:33:17Z
If it does, this is of Kevin and I last year at school....

Wow that was a pain...that better work.

You make me wanna throw my pager out the window...

2001-05-07T12:03:07Z
Hehe. Got up at 4 due to a very special phone call. :o) Was very glad to get it. So I'm still up, which is cool, cause I went to bed at 6pm and slept 10 hours. I'm on my way to the store and the tanning bed, then I will probably come back home and either do nothing or sleep. It's great to have nothing to do. I'm a little bored, but I just keep thinking about all the times where I'm doing something I don't want to (like working) and how much I wish I were at home then. So here I am, and I'm making the most of it.

Back to work tonight....uggghh. Ah well, it's ok. Hopefully at the end of this week, I'll have some special visitors, and that will sure make it alllll better. I hope I'm still in this good of a mood when I go to work tonight. Today is sing into my hairbrush and dance around the house day for sure. Plus I just got done watching Rudolph the Rednosed Raindeer (yes, the claymation one!!), and How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Yikes. I feel sensational after getting that much sleep! Later...

This is cool, most of it is pretty accurate, even though I dont buy into this stuff...Ok, let's see if I can get my whole journal in the subject line...lol jk here ya go...

2001-05-06T20:51:33Z
What does your sign say about you? The stars are very particular - read on and find out what the space/time continuum says about the inner you.

aries - the ram

(March 21 - April 20)

All about Aries:
Is it hot in here, or is it just you? You're a fire sign, baby. And a pushy one at that. They don't call you the Ram for nothing. You're pretty used to getting what you want. Hey, if you weren't the first sign of the zodiac already, you'd probably bully all the other signs into letting you go ahead of them. You're fearless, adventurous, and you've got some sort of espresso-like substance running through your veins that makes you wanna go, go go!

On the love front:
You're such a fireball that finding a cutie that challenges you is a must. When you discover someone who can actually keep up with your speed-crazy pace, you'll have no choice but to fall head over Steve Maddens.

Best smooch signs:
Libra, Gemini, Aquariushint hint lol

School stuff:
You have a tendency to spend your class time daydreaming about all the stuff you'd rather be doing (Goodness!! If that ain't the truth....). If you'd just put all that energy into your schoolwork, Aries, you could crush all the know-it-alls with the sheer force of your brain. We swear.

Star style:
Think leather, faux fur, and glitter. You love to be the center of attention, you diva, you. You can pull off the highest heels, the slinkiest fabrics, and the wildest trends. So, go ahead and work it!
Ok, I don't know about all that diva and leather stuff, but for the most part...it's me!

This is great...

2001-05-06T20:30:14Z
Phone just rang, it was Gas America....again.... I love caller ID.
Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha....I'm evil :o)